After months, no years, of talking about it I have finally handed in my notice and will be leaving the construction industry and the job that sucked so much out of me.
I can’t believe how much I have changed, just in the few days since the seed of the decision has been sown, before I acted on it. I feel lighter, free-er, happier than I have in years. This is a new type of happiness, the happiness that comes from regular meditation and Reiki practice. I have had glimpses of it in the past and read much about it but it always seemed elusive. I now realise that it was hidden behind the job – poking its head out occasionally to tease me but hiding again until I was ready to drop the veil of the job. A job I thought I needed so badly, the income, the travel, the flash dinners, the confidence of winning the latest contract. But over the last few months I had begun to see it for what it really was, fake, superficial and so much of it utterly pointless.
But those of us who have to go through a period of loss to gain more (and this is not everyone’s journey) will know the feeling when enough is enough, now is the time. For some it is forced upon them – redundancy, divorce, bereavement, losing the house. Then for some they are lucky enough to get to choose. Lucky? I’m not sure about that now that I’m writing this. The pain of the dilemma, weighing up the pros and cons, is this the right thing to do? Is this the right time to do it? It goes round and round your head. Aaaargh!
But then some small thing triggers the decision and makes it feel right – for me it was a conversation with my boyfriend’s sister – who said of the job “if it’s making you ill then you HAVE to get out”. Whilst I knew my health had suffered slightly (here I am playing it down again!) it took someone else to switch that light bulb on. But now I’ve got back to yoga classes and walks in daylight, getting in touch with friends again and already feeling creative again – the things that make us feel happy and help us enjoy life.
I know that now the hard work really begins though. I will probably need to get a part time job but for now I can concentrate on building my practice to help others. Introducing others to the benefits of meditation and Reiki (and soon reflexology), encouraging them to develop their own meditation practice and using the Reiki and reflexology to help them on their journey and to aid their bodies in healing.
I can also use the time to grow my knowledge of Neal’s Yard Remedies beautiful products and share these with others through parties and open days. I love the enthusiasm with which they create these divine skin and body care products and then share it with others – “one blue bottle at time”.
So if you are in need of a social way to discover gorgeous plant-based organic products, are in need of quiet space for meditation or would like to discover the balance or energy of Reiki, then please drop me a line. The easiest way is on 07779 088281 but there are other ways too which you can click here to find.
For the first time in a long time I really feel positive about my diary, not threatened by it……..and it is such a beautiful diary this year!
Love and light